The Autism Society Event and Education Recordings Archive

Frequently at autism conferences I see attendees who are overwhelmed from the pressures of living in a fast paced society, where there is little tolerance for differences.  These are people on the spectrum of autism, parents and, or, care givers, who share with me how they are suffering from sleep deprivation, emotional exhaustion and worry about the future.  Since I recognize feeling overwhelmed and stressed, from years of trying to be normal, instead of myself, a person affected by autism, and, to excel, in spite of my sensory challenges. (Some of you know that I was diagnosed as an adult with high functioning autism).  Everyone can benefit from methods to reduce stress and restore vital energy, especially those affected by autism.

This presentation will be interactive and a learning experience. The purpose is to learn to experience energy flows, and allow the possibility of change, by looking with non judgment at our lives right now, observing how we react to upsetting and often overwhelming events.  We will discover our own energy pathways, and how to notice when they are not functioning well.  We will learn exercises to increase the flow of positive energy and to release negative energy. Then we will relearn, how to breathe, and, be present in this moment in time, not regretting the past or dreaming of the future.

First, we must understand that we are all interconnected, that the choices we make affect not only ourselves, but, many others.  Our attitude is contagious.  Last week I arrived at the post office to discover that there was a long line and only two window attendants, one of whom was searching in the back for vacation mail that had been held for his customer.  The other employee appeared to be depressed, moving slowly as she processed each transaction.  It was clear that there would be a long wait to mail my package.  Because of the woman clerk’s low affect and unfriendly manner, each person spoke to her as if she were a machine, and, not a human being.  When I approached her window, I greeted her with “Good Morning.” I looked her in the eyes, and smiled.  She responded to my friendly gesture and chatted about the weather, processed my package kindly, and quickly, after I told her it contained baby things for my new grandson.  I tell you this story, because I was surprised by what happened. As I turned to leave, she greeted the next customer with a smile and hello, not a frown.  Our attitude, then, is contagious. 

We live in an age of consumerism.  In our culture, the messages sent through print and other media sources constantly pressure us to look outside ourselves for fulfillment.  We are told that we will be happy when we buy a specific product, live in a particular neighborhood, wear brand name clothing and drive an image car, that then, we will be happy. Purchasing things, or winning, or, becoming wealthy, will make us happy.  Consumerism may bring joy and happiness, for a short period, however, things and achievements do not fill our innermost longing, to be accepted and to be loved.  Seeking love and fulfillment of our dreams and desires becomes a lifelong pursuit; we allow the message of others to dictate who we are, and what our values will be.  We become reactors, rather than conscious participants in our lives, chasing after phantom dreams.  In Zen Buddhism, ‘What is the meaning of life?’  Is a question frequently asked of Zen Practitioners and students.  The acceptable answers are many, but the most meaningful one is: ‘To see things as they are.’ At first this seems simplistic, but when we look deeply it is very profound.  When we truly see things as they are, and find acceptance, we can then learn how to change our lives and our desires for distractions and possessions.

How does this relate to autism?  You may ask, how can I change my life when I have so little control over the events that affect me?

The only person I can change is my self.  I can change the way I perceive things and choose, how, I respond.  In the process, I can change the way I live my life. I can choose to be happy, or I can choose to be unhappy, no matter how overwhelming the circumstances.  Remember the story of the Post Office employee?  Because I chose to be friendly, I felt calm and happy, and she, may have sensed that someone cared about her that morning.  This is not to say, we can not be unset, sad, unhappy, but to express our feelings fully in the moment, and, to choose our responses. We can show empathy in how we react.

Recently I spoke about this topic to group of young adults, and one woman expressed her objection to the idea of choosing her anger. Other people made her angry, she did not choose it. Daniel Goleman, in his ground breaking book, Emotional Intelligence, describes how we react to events in habitual ways, and that with awareness, we can change our responses, and tailor our emotions, and reactions to others. As strange as this may seem, no one can make you angry.  We create our own emotions.

How can this be?  Here is an exercise that helps us understand.

For this exercise, you can be sitting or standing.

Take a deep breath, all the way down to your waistline, or a bit lower, Exhale, Now, close you eyes and think back to an event that caused you to feel a strong emotion. Not a life changing event, but one that is upsetting. For an example, someone cuts you off and takes your parking space. Picture if you can, where you were, what happened, what was said.  What you replied and what you did, your actions or inaction.  Feel the emotion as you inhale.  Now, give a name to the emotion. (My anger, My sadness.) Mentally scan your body, and feel the emotion, notice where you feel it.  Now, exhale, letting go of any of the emotion you no longer need. Notice if the area of your body seems less tense.  Now, change the way you respond next time by seeing through the eyes of others, by changing your habitual responses.

An example of seeing through the eyes of others is when I saw through the eyes of the postal attendant, when I chose empathy, by not getting upset by her slowness, but rather pictured her as she may have driven to work that morning through the fog and slippery streets, early, before I got up. At first, I folded my arms and sighed, but then I noticed her fleeting glance as she looked up at the long line of customers, I sensed that she must be feeling pressure from the people waiting to be served. I smiled at my habitual response to waiting in line and stepped into her life for a moment, felt understanding for her situation, and then, choose to be kind.

Now I want to talk about the chi and the energy body, and how you were able to define, if you could, where you were feeling an emotion in the exercise of choosing an Emotion that we just did.

In our culture the medicine we know is based upon the premise that when we are sick, the body is broken and needs to be fixed through prescriptions, surgery, and or, a change of lifestyle. Eastern philosophy is based upon the notion that the body has innate wisdom, and that energy within and surrounding the cells of the body determine the function of the entire organism.  For many years, Western medicine has debunked the idea of energy channels, called Meridians and of energy fields surrounding the body called an aura.  Recently scientists have been able to register electromagnetic fields in advanced FMRI tests that support eastern medicine and practices such as acupuncture, Reiki and Tai Chi. Doctors and scientists are beginning to embrace the concept of complimentary medicine, including its study in their medical training. The body functions synergistically, supporting the idea of Meridians and Energy Channels or Fields.  When our bodies become stressed, energy is sent to heart, brain and large muscles, so that we can run from danger or fight off the Saber Toothed Tiger.  Once the danger is past, chi energy is restored and balance is returned.  However, in our culture, many people are in constant stress, not just on rare occasions as our bodies were designed. Because stress is the usual state, not the unusual, our bodies and lives are continually out of balance and eventually we become sick.

Energy:

We constantly giving out and receiving energy.  We do this all of the time even when we are asleep.  Energy or chi is all around us. Many of us feel or sense it even if we are not consciously aware of energy.  You may remember a situation when you entered a room after others have left and have felt uncomfortable with the residual anger or discontent in the space. Even though the people are gone, the electromagnetic charge from the anger remains.  If our auras, the energy fields surrounding out bodies, are depleted, these negative electromagnetic charged particles can attach to our energy fields. Over time, we can absorb enough negative energy to become depleted and even ill.

These energy fields are not speculation; they can be measured with electrodes.  The fields extend outward in an oval pattern that can be photographed with heat sensitive film.  Sensitive people see colors within the aura and have learned to notice areas of depletion or of health, by reading the colors.

Negative Energy:

When we gather negative energy we become tired, disoriented and lose our sense of humor and our love of life.  We can learn to identify the areas of our energy fields that have become depleted.  By placing your hands over the area of your body that is weak, and intending that healing energy (loving compassion) flow into it, the body can begin to restore vitality and health.  Of course, if we do not change our responses to the stressors in life, we will continue the pattern leading to disease and eventually death.

Experiencing chi energy:

Many discount the idea of energy fields because they do not see them.  Since they are of a doubting mind, it is unlikely that they will sense energy frequency or vibration.

Sometimes I think of the story of two fish swimming deep in the ocean of water.  One fish turns to the other to ask. So what do you think about this thing called ocean?  The other turns to reply. Oh, I don’t know about such things, I have never seen an ocean.

Chi energy is like the ocean of water for the fish, except it is an ocean of air in which we live.  Without air we would not be alive.

The following exercises will introduce you to the concept of energy fields and allow you to balance your energy and the energy of your family members.

Learning to Breathe with Chi Energy

Balancing Energy

Releasing Negative Energy

Suggestions for living a life of joy and gratitude:

Express your emotions

Mediate and connect to the source of life, god, spirit, nature

Establish boundaries

Find ways to create, and to be intentional in your life choices

Learn to laugh and be grateful

Reading materials:

Ask and Tell, Self-Advocacy and Disclosure, Edited by Stephen Shore 2004

Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman 1995
Social Intelligence, Daniel Goleman 2006

The Emotional Revolution, Norman E. Rosenthal 2002

Energy Medicine, Donna Eden 1998

Learning Objectives: